Management cliches : Wed Feb 15, 2012 1:21 pm  

Copied from Hull Daily Mail website http://www.thisishullandeastriding.co.u ... story.html Just reminded me of Gus from Drop the Dead Donkey.....is it possible to come up with any more bollox in such a short space: Speaking about the savage funding cuts the force is facing, chief finance officer Phil Goatley said: "We are only halfway through the journey. The second half of the game will be much more difficult." Fourteen members of the authority backed the move, with only East Riding Conservative Councillor David Rudd and North East Lincolnshire's John England opposing the move. Councillor Rudd said: "I think we are looking a gift horse in the mouth. "We have substantial savings and I think we should use them. I also have confidence in the chief officers to find the extra savings." However, Independent member David Smith said: "The question we have to ask ourselves is have we cut out all the fat and will further moves begin to cut into the bone? "I am of the opinion it will be the bone we cut into." While Councillor Colin Inglis said: "I think our friend has looked the gift horse in the mouth and seen a lovely set of teeth, but has failed to realise its legs are broken."

Copied from Hull Daily Mail website http://www.thisishullandeastriding.co.u ... story.html Just reminded me of Gus from Drop the Dead Donkey.....is it possible to come up with any more bollox in such a short space: Speaking about the savage funding cuts the force is facing, chief finance officer Phil Goatley said: "We are only halfway through the journey. The second half of the game will be much more difficult." Fourteen members of the authority backed the move, with only East Riding Conservative Councillor David Rudd and North East Lincolnshire's John England opposing the move. Councillor Rudd said: "I think we are looking a gift horse in the mouth. "We have substantial savings and I think we should use them. I also have confidence in the chief officers to find the extra savings." However, Independent member David Smith said: "The question we have to ask ourselves is have we cut out all the fat and will further moves begin to cut into the bone? "I am of the opinion it will be the bone we cut into." While Councillor Colin Inglis said: "I think our friend has looked the gift horse in the mouth and seen a lovely set of teeth, but has failed to realise its legs are broken."

Re: Management cliches : Wed Feb 15, 2012 1:36 pm  

Was it Mix Your Own Metaphor night or something?

Re: Management cliches : Wed Feb 15, 2012 1:41 pm  

A few years ago at work, the bloke running the meeting came up with:

"Don't you think its time we pulled our pants up and started running, cos I certainly don't want to be the jam in the sandwich when the lights go green!"

I think I did a little wee of joy at the time

Re: Management cliches : Wed Feb 15, 2012 1:49 pm  

Stanley Unwin wrote:

A few years ago at work, the bloke running the meeting came up with:

"Don't you think its time we pulled our pants up and started running, cos I certainly don't want to be the jam in the sandwich when the lights go green!"

I think I did a little wee of joy at the time

To which you should have said, either: "Can you please speak English?" or "What the f*** are you talking about?". Works every time when everyone laughs.

Re: Management cliches : Wed Feb 15, 2012 2:19 pm  

I used to have a boss who was always 'boiling the ocean', 'eating an elephant', 'spinning plates', or some other such rubbish. He was one of the few people I've heard use cliches like that who hasn't been a total cock.

Re: Management cliches : Wed Feb 15, 2012 2:32 pm  

I currently have a very good boss – but she doesn't half enjoy stuff like Myers Briggs. And she actually speaks in acronyms every so often – 'FYI is a favourite'.

Re: Management cliches : Wed Feb 15, 2012 2:44 pm  

It was recently decided that our cumulative decades of experience of dealing with non-technical staff in admin departments could only be improved if all those links were broken and a non-technical project manager (who takes notes with fscking mind map software! jesus fscking christ will you at least wait until I've finished explaining before trying to organise concepts you don't understand into hierarchical relationships you're making up on the spot!) put in to pass messages between them and us. This, apparently, is taking the holistic approach.

Re: Management cliches : Wed Feb 15, 2012 2:58 pm  

An ex-manager once came out with "sometimes the simplest things are the easiest". We've used this in the past to come up with lines for meeting bingo.

An ex-manager once came out with "sometimes the simplest things are the easiest". We've used this in the past to come up with lines for meeting bingo.

Re: Management cliches : Wed Feb 15, 2012 3:33 pm  

vbfg wrote:

It was recently decided that our cumulative decades of experience of dealing with non-technical staff in admin departments could only be improved if all those links were broken and a non-technical project manager (who takes notes with fscking mind map software! jesus fscking christ will you at least wait until I've finished explaining before trying to organise concepts you don't understand into hierarchical relationships you're making up on the spot!) put in to pass messages between them and us. This, apparently, is taking the holistic approach.

Should be a sackable offence!

Hello : Wed Feb 15, 2012 5:30 pm  

An ex-colleague - 'We'll touch bases later.' Errr, no we won't! Your getting the bullet very shortly because you're a cock.