[John_D]

Re: Terrorism is back? : Thu Jul 05, 2012 12:58 pm  

WIZEB wrote:

Hedgehog internment could be the way forward for the Bullingdon clique?

It's the only language they understand, the spiny bar stewards

Re: Terrorism is back? : Thu Jul 05, 2012 1:52 pm  

Mock if you like, but I've been there when a hedgehog went off. They're like nail bombs.

Re: Terrorism is back? : Thu Jul 05, 2012 2:27 pm  

Back in 1973, I was working in that there Lunnon and staying in a B&B in Earl's Court. My mate & I got up one morning, went down stairs and found a deserted hotel: no one on reception, empty restaurant zilch.

On venturing outside we were grabbed by armed rozzers from Special Branch and asked where we'd come from and what we'd been up to. It took a while but they finally accepted that we were staying there and they hadn't done such a good job on ecavuating the hotel as they thought they had. Turns out one bloke who was in another room decided that life was a bit too much, so he filled the meter with 5p pieces and topped himself with the help of the gas fire (still on town gas in those days). Someone had smelled gas and once they opened the room, they found this geezer, lying stark bollock naked, in front of the fire. He had wires attached to his leg and the wires led to a brown paper parcel. The Bomb Squad and SB were called out and after some delicate manipulations, they discovered that it wasn't an IRA boby-trap, he'd simply ripped the battery wires out of an old Binatone radio and sellotaped them to his leg. He just wanted to leave causing the maximum disruption.

It was then I that remembered someone hammering on the door and telling us we had to get out immediately. In my fug, I yelled OK and rolled over and went back to kip.

Re: Terrorism is back? : Thu Jul 05, 2012 2:36 pm  

Chris28 wrote: Danny Baker ‏@prodnose Journeying back to London, I finally opened my tupperware of porridge and was just applying a flask of hot milk when.. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-18719962 update: he was having an e-cig

Chris28 wrote: Danny Baker ‏@prodnose Journeying back to London, I finally opened my tupperware of porridge and was just applying a flask of hot milk when.. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-18719962 update: he was having an e-cig

[John_D]

Re: Terrorism is back? : Thu Jul 05, 2012 2:50 pm  

cod'ead wrote: update: he was having an e-cig AAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!! PANIC But why haven't the police mentioned the hedgehog in that? Conspiracy afoot, methinks. What are they trying to hide?

cod'ead wrote: update: he was having an e-cig AAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!! PANIC But why haven't the police mentioned the hedgehog in that? Conspiracy afoot, methinks. What are they trying to hide?

Re: Terrorism is back? : Thu Jul 05, 2012 3:30 pm  

John_D wrote:

AAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!! PANIC



But why haven't the police mentioned the hedgehog in that? Conspiracy afoot, methinks. What are they trying to hide?

They don't want people swerving all over the motorway just to avoid a puncture

Re: Terrorism is back? : Thu Jul 05, 2012 4:14 pm  

cod'ead wrote:

Back in 1973, I was working in that there Lunnon and staying in a B&B in Earl's Court. My mate & I got up one morning, went down stairs and found a deserted hotel: no one on reception, empty restaurant zilch.

On venturing outside we were grabbed by armed rozzers from Special Branch and asked where we'd come from and what we'd been up to. It took a while but they finally accepted that we were staying there and they hadn't done such a good job on ecavuating the hotel as they thought they had. Turns out one bloke who was in another room decided that life was a bit too much, so he filled the meter with 5p pieces and topped himself with the help of the gas fire (still on town gas in those days). Someone had smelled gas and once they opened the room, they found this geezer, lying stark bollock naked, in front of the fire. He had wires attached to his leg and the wires led to a brown paper parcel. The Bomb Squad and SB were called out and after some delicate manipulations, they discovered that it wasn't an IRA boby-trap, he'd simply ripped the battery wires out of an old Binatone radio and sellotaped them to his leg. He just wanted to leave causing the maximum disruption.

It was then I that remembered someone hammering on the door and telling us we had to get out immediately. In my fug, I yelled OK and rolled over and went back to kip.

Somewhere on my blog there is the story of how I slept, undiscovered through two fire evacuations at my hotel in Whitley Bay, and also the one about how I accidently set fire to the gas supply pipe in my room in another hotel on a cold winters night, it suddenly made the room very hot indeed - I left the next morning and never went back.

Re: Terrorism is back? : Thu Jul 05, 2012 4:15 pm  

cod'ead wrote: update: he was having an e-cig Believe it or not, one of my colleagues at our head office in Birmingham uses one of those - he has been asked to go outside into the street when he wants an "esmoke" along with all of the regular smokers.

cod'ead wrote: update: he was having an e-cig Believe it or not, one of my colleagues at our head office in Birmingham uses one of those - he has been asked to go outside into the street when he wants an "esmoke" along with all of the regular smokers.

Re: Terrorism is back? : Thu Jul 05, 2012 4:54 pm  

McLaren_Field wrote:

Believe it or not, one of my colleagues at our head office in Birmingham uses one of those - he has been asked to go outside into the street when he wants an "esmoke" along with all of the regular smokers.

Before the workplace smoking ban, at my workplace they banned smoking in the office but allowed smokers to use a special manky room.
The non-smokers said it wasn't fair that smokers could just slope off whenever they felt like it, so the employers thought they'd reward the non-smokers with extra hols instead.
I can't remember the number of days it came down to ... but a colleague worked it out that it was the equivalent of being out of the office for ten fags per working day, which wasn't fair, as he was a twenty-a-day non-smoker.

Re: Terrorism is back? : Thu Jul 05, 2012 5:04 pm  

McLaren_Field wrote:

Believe it or not, one of my colleagues at our head office in Birmingham uses one of those - he has been asked to go outside into the street when he wants an "esmoke" along with all of the regular smokers.

I'd considewred getting one to help quit smoking but after today's shenanegans, I don't think I'll bother. I'll take me chance, I've never heard of a hospice getting raided by armed police