: Wed Jul 08, 2009 12:21 pm  

Dave Heron's Moustache wrote:

They said it best on Spitting Image. Still as accurate today as it was in the 80's.

"I've travelled this old world of ours from Barnsley to Peru
I've had sunshine in the arctic and a swim in Tinbuktu
I've seen unicorns in Burma and a Yetti in Nepal
And I've danced with ten foot pygmies in a Montezuma hall
I've met the King of China and a working Yorkshire miner
But I've never met a nice South African.

No he's never met a nice South African
And that's not bloody surprising man
'Cause we're a bunch of arrogant b***tards
Who hate black people

I once got served in Woolies aften less than four week's wait
I had lunch with Rowan Atkinson when he paid and wasn't late
I know a public swimming bath where they don't mickey in the pool
I know a guy who got a job straight after leaving school
I've met a normal merman and a fairly modest German
But I've never met a nice South African.

No he's never met a nice South African
And that's not bloody surprising man
'Cause we're a bunch of talentless murderers
Who smell like baboons

I've had a close encounter of the twenty-second kind
That's when an alien spaceship disappears up your behind
I got directory enquiries after less than forty rings
I've even heard a decent song by Paul McCartney's Wings
I've seen a flying pig in a quite convincing wig
But I've never met a nice South African.

No he's never met a nice South African
And that's not bloody surprising man
'Cause we're a bunch of ignorant loudmouths
With no sense of humour - ha ha

I've met the Loch Ness monster and he looks like Fred Astaire
At the BBC in London he's the chief commissionaire
I know a place in Glasgow which is rife with daffodillies
I met a man in Katmandu who claimed to have two willies
I've had a nice pot noodle but I've never had a poodle
And I've never met a nice South African.

No he's never met a nice South African
And that's not bloody surprising man
Because we've never met one either
Except for Breyten Breytenbach and he's emigrated to Paris. (farts)

Yes he's quite a nice South African
And he's hardly ever killed anyone
And he's not smelly at all.
That's why they put him prison. "

For those of you who weren't born when the original was performed.

: Wed Jul 08, 2009 1:51 pm  

all blacks this week

: Mon Jul 13, 2009 9:16 am  

King of the strops.....strops!!!! http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sp ... union.html

King of the strops.....strops!!!! http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sp ... union.html

: Mon Jul 13, 2009 9:26 am  

espanyolswan wrote: King of the strops.....strops!!!! http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sp ... union.html But what about all his charidy work mate? The charidy work that stopped him getting a driving ban. Nob.

espanyolswan wrote: King of the strops.....strops!!!! http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sp ... union.html But what about all his charidy work mate? The charidy work that stopped him getting a driving ban. Nob.

: Mon Jul 13, 2009 9:59 am  

espanyolswan wrote: King of the strops.....strops!!!! http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sp ... union.html Quit? I wasn't aware that he had started. Him and his wife deserve each other. Look you. Isn't it. Yurrings.

espanyolswan wrote: King of the strops.....strops!!!! http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sp ... union.html Quit? I wasn't aware that he had started. Him and his wife deserve each other. Look you. Isn't it. Yurrings.

[Matt_Horton]

: Mon Jul 13, 2009 10:31 am  

He'll end up being a stay at home Dad now while his missus earns all the brass.

: Mon Jul 13, 2009 12:30 pm  

Oldham Rhino wrote:

He'll end up being a stay at home Dad now while his missus earns all the brass.

Think he will end up bleeding Celtic Crusaders dry myself.

: Mon Jul 13, 2009 12:50 pm  

espanyolswan wrote:

Think he will end up bleeding Celtic Crusaders dry myself.

Depends.

If he gets an injury settlement from his insurance for loss of earnings then he won't be able to play professional sport again at any level.

: Mon Jul 13, 2009 2:14 pm  

Andy Gilder wrote:

Depends.

If he gets an injury settlement from his insurance for loss of earnings then he won't be able to play professional sport again at any level.

True but with his age and the fact it seems its more a mental than physical reason why he has quit I can not see insurers having to cough up.

: Mon Jul 13, 2009 9:58 pm  

all blacks are playing games