I think I speak for most normal people here - what point are you trying to make - it's not funny it's juvenile and there is a huge difference.
Also FYI the Wetherby Whaler which is a chain of Fish & Chip resturants was for a boxing day friendly game only, that ok with you.
Backstage are a very supportive local educational outfit, they kindly donated the away shirt (you do realise it's the same season shirt) - 8 companies entered the draw paying x amount and the pet people won - Morrisons and Audi were two of the others for whom I'm sure you'd have creamed yourself, just luck of the draw.
Now lets have another hillarious anecdote pleeeease