: Sat Sep 26, 2009 12:22 pm
What’s the worse piece of advice you’ve ever received?
Mine has to be from this guy whose basically Jord 50 years from now with liposuction
He told me “A woman’s, a woman”
Anyways I tried his formula on stage last night in the HiFi (the place that became infamous for the Rio Ferdinand assaults) on the stage and I was attacked by a walrus. Anyways this walrus in particular liked my orange shorts so I did the honours of showing my covered backside to it and I got the biggest cramp in my leg ever. So I tried shouting my mate over but he though I was doing a weird dance the idiot. So I was stranded standing like a Wally on stage for at least twenty minutes till he realised something was wrong.
The best of the night was still to come when I went back to my mate house to be greeted by a once white Rastafarian whose now had his dreadlocks cut off. It was the worse Irony I’ve every seen when my mate started eating an apple pie right in front of him.
Only turns out the guy was homeless.
He’ll get an house soon though and he’s invited me to his homecoming. He always does the best house parties and I can’t wait!